My best friend’s father died on Saturday. I’ve known her and her family since I was 13 years old, so her family feels like my family.

Weldon and I went to see them yesterday afternoon and took what seemed like 10 pounds of chicken salad and a loaf of sourdough bread. While we were there, other friends brought a ton of cold cuts and bread, enough to make about a million sandwiches. There were already lots of cookies and donuts there.

I spoke to my friend, her sisters, and their mother. Her mother told me it was so nice to see my sweet face, which touched my heart deeply. And we visited with all the other relatives, the ones that we usually see at birthday parties.

There was much sadness in the house, but  plenty of laughter also. All the kids were running around, enjoying all the people and all the cookies. I finally told my friend I would be on call for her all week and I would be keeping in touch, and Weldon and I left after lots more hugs.

On our way home, Weldon and I had a long conversation. He said he never knows what to see in those situations, that he always has to fight the urge to ask, “How are you?” He said it doesn’t feel completely right to him to ask that, since he already knows the answer.

I think it’s an OK question to ask. It’s what I asked my friend, her sisters, and their mother. It gave each of them a chance to say out loud, I’m doing awful. Not good. I don’t know yet. This sucks. And it gave us a chance to cry together and to share a moment of human connection through strong emotion.

I was grateful that Weldon and I had this conversation. It helped me see that this kind of presence and connection is what makes life beautiful. And I will watch for opportunities to experience it. It obviously doesn’t have to be connection through sadness. It could be connection through joy and laughter or complete presence through conscious gratitude for a particular person in my life. But now that Weldon has helped me open up this awareness, I’ll be on the lookout for it everywhere.

I was listening to Fresh Air on NPR the other night on my way home from teaching a class. The guests were Toni Frohoff, a behavorial and wildlife biologist, and journalist Charles Siebert.

They were talking about a group of gray whales off the coast of Baja California in Mexico that are actively seeking out human interaction. Their stories were amazing! Mr. Siebert talked about a baby gray whale that popped out of the water an arm’s length from him and stared at him! How amazing that a whale was watching us! Mr. Siebert said that this experience of being watched by a whale changed him.

I came home and looked up Charles Siebert’s full article in the New York Times Magazine. (You can read it  here.) I was completely spellbound by the research he reports on and the world of whales. Could a creature so different from us really be so similar to us? It looks like the answer,  and with scientific backup, is yes!

I don’t know why this fills me with such joy, but it does. I don’t know why this fills me with such hope, but it does. 

May all creatures everywhere be happy and free, and may the thoughts and actions of my own life contribute in some way to that happiness and freedom for all.

Many native American cultures see animals as messengers. Similarly, I’m a big believer in watching for messages about our lives in the nature that surrounds us. For example, if you know the story of how I came to build Laughing Ladybug Yoga, you know the significance I place on natural messengers.

Over the last few days, 3 doves  have nearly flown straight into the windshield of my tiny little Smart car.

After the third one, I hollered, “OK! I get it!”

But what I was saying I “got,” I didn’t know. I had to do some research.

Here are some of the things I found: 

The Dove represents peace of the deepest kind. It soothes and quiets our worried and troubled thoughts, and enables us to find renewal in the silence of mind. In these moments of stillness we are able to appreciate the simple things in life.

Hmm. Almost crashing into my windshild was a bold move for a representative of peace. But I do tend to need a louder message than some people.

Doves are members of the pigeon family. Both symbolise the qualities of home, security and maternal instincts.

I have been doing a lot of “nesting” lately. Rearranging furniture and redecorating. I’ve been struggling a lot with quitting one of my yoga classes so that I have more time at home with my husband. I had a conversation with a client last week about the struggle to balance family and career, how we as women don’t really learn how to do that, but that we have to choose one or the other. 

If Dove flies into your life, you are being asked to go within and release your emotional disharmony, be it of the past or the present. Dove helps us to rid trauma stored within our cellular memory. Humming can help you with this release.

This really struck something in me when I read it, since it reminded me that trauma is stored in our cellular memory.

So I think that Dove is telling me that at this point in my life, and in the life of my marriage, it’s smart to direct so much energy to my home, homelife, and husband.  And that it’s time to cleanse my cellular memory of disharmony to make room for harmony.

I love that the natural world is so in tune with us, or that we’re so in tune with it. But really, neither is correct. We ARE nature, and nature IS us, so of course there is a natural flow of energy between the two.

What are your opinions about the struggle to balance home and career? How have you found it? Or have you? I’d love to hear from you.

I’m feeling really grateful this week. I have a wonderful life that’s filled with great friends and family. I’m married to the sweetest and most supportive man alive. And I have TWO jobs that I enjoy! Life is good.

My husband Weldon and I have some wonderful neighbors all up and down our street. We have become especially close to Scott and Dana, who live across the street from us. They are kind and quiet and always ready to lend a hand when something crazy happens (sofas stuck in doorways, car batteries giving out, etc.). Scott and Weldon also share a similar intolerance of speeders, traveling “salesmen,” and other neighborhood nuisances. We enjoy just talking with them in the front yard. I remember one hot day sharing root beer floats together in our front yard, just because it was fun.

The theme for my July newsletter is going to be Friends and Neighbors. For some reason, this time of year, when we’re all outside barbecuing and weedeating and sitting still drinking lemonade, always makes me think of neighbors and how important they are in our lives.

Our neighbors ultimately make up our community, and each of our communities makes up our city. So being a good neighbor helps us maintain a friendly city.

Send me a story about your favorite neighbor. Or if you have a favorite quote about neighbors or friends, please share it with me. I’m gathering things for my newsletter now and I love to have contributions from readers.